31/8/20 ^^^Let's see if it is worthwhile to go for Gold

The big question here is can I do without Els?

If I can [] (then) I just SNAP VANISH.

The whole feeling of attachment could be due to the effect of Nicorette.  Now is to test what is it like without me chewing Nicorette.

Today I SNAP VANISH.  Without Nicorette, I am not in the mood at all to contact her.

Let's assess the situation today.

This whole week is to test my resilience towards Els.  If I can do without her the entire week, then I know all this while it is due to the Nicorette.  Take away the Nicorette, take away Els.  Like that...

I put the Nicorette strip in front of me.  I want to find out if I have the urge to chew Nicorette when I hear Els's voice.  If not then there is no correlation between Nicorette and Els.

Yes, there is a correlation.  I am salivating.  That means, if I can resist Nicorette, I can resist Els.

Both are nothing more than mental conditioning.

The urge is not that strong.  Today is Aush's playlist.  She probably handles Wednesday and Friday sessions.

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Instead of going with the flow, let's use this next 4 hours to RESIST Nicorette and Els. Let's break the addiction.  I will come out stronger every time I can overcome Els. If I can overcome Els, I can overcome Nicorette and vice versa.  It's like breaking a bronco.

Fair enough?

OK, the salivating had lessened.  I am using Els as a slingshot for me to quit Nicorette.

To be fair, on Friday, I will respond back to her.  Until then, I become the mute guard dog.  This is the test of my own resilience.  If I have the discipline to resist Els, then I have the discipline to resist Nicorette.  For goodness sake, I need to SNAP VANISH.

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This is more than just breaking a bad habit.  This is about taking control of things that are controlling my life.  If I can take control of my correspondence with Els, automatically I can control my desire to chew Nicorette.

I believe if I can have self-control, I can lead a more fulfilling life.  Now I cannot control those things that matter in my life:

• Sleep
• Exercise
• Food
• Nicorette 
• Els

If I can develop the discipline to manage these variables, I then can achieve my ultimate goal to be thin and fast.

Take it that this is the first day I am breaking the bronco.  In other words, take it that this is the first day I decided to be a person with discipline and self-control.

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