Today is Day 14th of the Nicorette cessation.
I feel good today.
I realize that not everything is black and white.
Our perception is colored by the mood that we are in. And that is determined by our neurochemicals.
Today I am in a better mood than I was yesterday.
The lesson here is to keep on improving the brain chemical.
------------------------
This is my immediate thinking. Albeit delivering the courses or Songkhla 2030, I need to set a direction. However, the actual course of the flow is not up to me. In this case, I just go with the flow.
I do feel that my situation will improve much if I chew Nicorette. Nevertheless, I don't want to do it because of the withdrawal effect.
--------------------------
These past 2 weeks had been crazy. We had the renovation going on next door and I am trying my best to stay levelheaded. I'm telling you, at times I thought I had lost it.
This is only 14 days. I had gotten rid of Nicorette but I had not gotten rid of food addiction. I still have a long way to go.
What is important to me now is to have the unsurpassed feeling of certainty. I need unconditional love. That love right now it the love for food and Nicorette, That is what I need to unscramble.
Instead, I need to love myself. It is a sad thing not to feel loved by your own mother. I think that is the bulk of the problem. I can never resolve that. I have to accept the fact that my mother doesn't love me. Fuck...
-------------------------------
I only win my battle with Nicorette if I don't ever take it again.
So here is the basic question, "Will I ever be happy again without Nicorette?" Evidence showed that things will get better. Therefore I need to give my body a chance for it to recover. I need until the end of the year for that to happen.
-------------------------------
No comments:
Post a Comment